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Welcome, and here’s what you can expect from me.

I was born with ink in my veins and a story in my soul. My only problem is I perfected the art of procrastination at the beginning of my teenage years.

I may not update regularly with my original material, and I may not talk about things you particularly want to hear, but I believe we can happily co-exist in this reader-writer partnership if we practice patience and kindness.

This little website I have set up here is for a school project, but I’m planning on taking it further into my life. It should be interesting to see where my writing career takes me (hopefully I’ll have finished at least the first book in my novel saga I have been planning for nearly a decade…more to come on that later).

I’m a poet, first and foremost. Although I came into this industry with my heart completely set on becoming a novelist, I have found a gateway for getting my intentions across through poetry. A lot of my poetry, and my writing in general, deals with some heavy stuff. Consider this your trigger warning, folks: I write about self-harm, depression, anxiety and disabilities.

I love receiving feedback, both of critic and of praise, so please don’t hesitate to comment on my work.

Also, just a disclaimer: All of this work is my own, and I claim copyright over my posts and comments.

 

Bye for now,

Taylor xx

Power Corrupts

Seeing nothing but green
But while you’re cashing in
You’re making me sick
Your sight too thick
To realise her small sighs
Broken smile, tired eyes
No financial stresses
Getting to buy new dresses
I admit this life is great
But let’s set this straight

If it hadn’t been for you
I’d struggle to get through
Would’ve been down on my luck
But I’d have been less fucked
In the head, struggle to talk
In fear of being told to walk
Away least you get mad
And I know that when it gets bad
You turn to her, two drinks in
You’re both drunken

Fools don’t recognize
A toxic relationship can liquefy
Families left fearful
Of not being careful
She says bruises are love bites
I was too young to see the lies
He blamed his on cricket balls
But I heard it in the hall
Making her listen, arm twisted
Her nearly dropping their kid

You’ve taught me violence
Power is attainable if there’s silence
I’m careful of wine
Too much is not worth a dime
I say I’m scared of quick movement
Because of my lack of visual judgment
But truth be told, I’ve learned to fear\
Being hit from ones I hold dear

 

Personal Update and Appreciation Post

Hi there, guys. Long time, no speak. First and foremost, I would like to thank you for reading my poetry. Everything I write means a lot to me, and I appreciate your support. Truly, it has been great so far.

Also, I know that I have been incredibly lax in the story-time part of my blogging. So far it has consistently been poetry, for over a year. I did promise to post other things here, not just poems. For some reason, I feel like this is a good starting point.

I’m doing fairly well. I’m officially finished my first year of classes at University. I’ve only got two more years to go, and I couldn’t be more excited about the year ahead. At the time of writing this, I’m about to head off to Melbourne to see my idol Taylor Swift perform her Reputation stadium tour. She’s my idol for so many reasons, but the best one is because she inspired me to write poetry, except back then I framed them like song lyrics (only, you know…without the music). I still might attempt to learn how to create melodies and pick up my guitar or keyboard lessons again. But I’m still not sure.

I do have dreams to one day publish my own books for a living, whether they’re poetry books or actual novels. I have been working on a novel for about eight years now. It’s being a hard task, especially when I keep scrapping and starting it. But now, I’m at a comfortable pace with the story, and I’m trying a new way of starting it. I’m re-working my first draft of the story, which is something I hadn’t tried to do before. It helps that the draft was always incomplete, but it’s frustrating because I have changed so much as a writer over the past eight years. But I am chipping away at it.

I also would love to produce a book of my poetry, and even have an audio-book/mix-tape of sorts to go with it. I do have dreams of one day becoming a published author, possibly even a best-seller. I’m conflicted about this dream, because I know I need to aim high but I also don’t want to expect too much of myself either. It’s an incredibly fine line to follow.

As I’m sure some of you have noticed, my subject matter varies from incredibly dark emotions to happy emotions. This is life, especially when you are going through some of the most stressful things a human can go through (Planning a wedding and studying full-time at university) while also having diagnosed anxiety and going through severe bouts of depression. I want to tell you, point blank, that I am doing alright. I’m probably not at a 100% level of good mental health, but I’m in a safe place today. Some days are harder than others, some will go great until one thing is said or thought, then I convince myself to make it a good day, to go for a walk or to the gym. At the end of my session, I usually forget what was making me so anxious in the first place.

And, sometimes, the anxiety hits me for no reason at all. That is the most frustrating part of this. I’ll notice my breathing spike, and my heart rate jump. I assess the situation and tell myself there is nothing to stress about. Sometimes I know it can be because of a thought, other times it can be because of an event. Other times, just the thought of having to go to work triggers something, which is absolutely unnecessary because I love my job. There is an answer for it, and it has everything to do with the chemicals in my brain (and sometimes an excessive amount of caffeine, which is my lover and my enemy all in one). We need to continue the fight to recognize mental health issues are as important as physical health issues.

So hopefully, I will continue to bring more blogging posts to you. Please let me know if you like this. Don’t be afraid to send me questions regarding anything to do with either what I’ve spoken about above or any of my writing on this blog. I love and appreciate every single one of you reading this and responding to my content. It means more to me than you know.

Bye for now,

Taylor xx

 

Forced Contemplation

Smoky coffee sips
Instagram visual
Dry bitten lips
Haunting misrule

Either I’m too far in
To pull myself out
Or I’m going through something
And my mind is in doubt

Satellite in my head
Hemp on my skin
Reflections shine red
The midst of spring

Silence, no fear
I welcome it
Sunshine, it’s here
My narrative fits

These cracks in my veins
Are finally getting better

Lightning Love

I love you.

I love the way you smile
How your entire face lights up
Your eyes let off blue sparks
And your heart shines through
Every single time.

I love the way you focus
How your hands become steady
Your gaze flickers around your task
And your brow furrows slightly
Expressing a thousand curiosities.

I love how you feel to me
Every time I see you in the morning
My entire body warms to you
And when I see you again at night
It’s exactly like

Being inside during a thunderstorm
On a cold winter night
Wrapped in blankets
Reading my favourite book.
There’s a serene stillness about the air
With the hinted taste of static energy

The thought of you
Lights up my body
Electric pulses strike through me
Every time you touch me
Kiss me
Hold me
You love me

Every
Single
Time.

I love you.

Land of The Free: In Memoriam

Victory tastes much sweeter
When blood drips with honey.
Her broken cries are silenced
By big gun lawyers and hush money.

You’re destroying her innocence,
Choking out her once-joyous shout.
What do you believe would happen
If her sons and fathers found out?

You have ruined the Lady Justice;
You’ve crushed her sister Liberty.
While you sit there saying ‘woe is me’,
These women will never be set free.

Monster Boy

Your eyes were the colour of roses
When you first met him
His honey sweet smile
Calloused hands and sharp tongue
Unraveled your caged heart

Your mouth gave off lightening sparks
When you first kissed him
His venomous bite
Tore at your delicate skin, battle worn
From your anxious gnawing

Your tears became deep ocean spray
When you bid him goodbye
His stinging words
Inked themselves under your skin
As your heart locked back up

You try to escape the tattoos
But you can’t tear at your skin
Like he did
With his lying teeth